How to Tell if He Likes You
There's a guy in your life who has been catching your eye - it could be a guy you recently met, or an old friend who is giving you new feelings. Whoever the guy is, you're dying to know if he thinks you're just buddies or if he wants something more from you. If you want to know if a guy likes you, you have to pay attention to what he says and what he does when you're hanging out. If you want to know how he really feels about you, just follow these tips.
Analyze Your Conversations
Notice how he talks to you.The way he talks to you can say a lot about his real feelings for you. The next time you hang out, pay attention to his tone and the level of attention he gives you when you speak. Here are some ways to see if he likes you just based on how you talk to each other:
- See if he makes eye contact. Is he giving you his full attention, or looking around the room for something better to do? Is he breaking eye contact occasionally but smiling because he feels shy around you?
- See if he's giving you his full attention when he talks to you. Is he checking his phone and stopping to talk to other people? If so, then he may not be trying to impress you. But if he talks to you like you're the only person in the world, then he may have a big crush on you.
- See if he tries to impress you. Does he tell stories that make him look strong, funny, or adventurous? If so, then he probably wants to catch your eye.
- See if he talks more softly when he’s around you. This may be his way of telling you to lean in to get closer.
Notice what he talks about.If the guy has you firmly planted in his friend zone, then he'll talk to you differently than he would if he was trying to impress you and make you see him as more than a friend. You should pay attention not only to how he talks to you, but to what he chooses to talk about.
- See if he reveals personal information. If he's opening up to you about trouble with his friends or family, then he values your opinion and likes you. But if he's opening up to you about a new girl he likes, then you may have a problem.
- See if he mentions his childhood. This is pretty private for most guys, and if he opens up about it, then he’s definitely trying to get closer to you.
- See if he compliments you. If he tells you that you look nice, or finds subtle ways to let you know you're interesting or funny, then he may be falling for you.
- See if he teases you. If he feels comfortable enough around you to tease you, then he might like you.
- See if he tries to be more refined around you. If you notice him burping, cursing, and being generally a little bit gross around his bros, but find him never cursing and speaking in a measured and polite way around you, then he's trying to impress you.
See how he talks about other girls.If he talks to you about other girls, it'll be for one of two reasons. Either he likes you and wants to make you jealous, or he just sees you as a friend and wants your advice. Here's how to find out what it means when he tells you about other ladies:
- If he's always complaining about women he's dating or says, "None of them are what I'm looking for," then he may be hinting that you're the one.
- If he always asks you for romantic advice no matter who he's dating, then he may see you as a friend. If he says that you give the best advice, he may not be looking at you as more than a friend.
- If he's always talking about his latest conquest but not asking for advice, he could just be showing off to win you over. But be careful - you don't want to end up being just another number in his little black book.
- If he ever compares a girl to you unfavorably by saying something like, “She’s cool, but she’s not nearly as funny as you,” then he’s telling you he’d rather be dating you instead.
Think About What He Does
Notice his body language.His body language can be a big factor in showing you if he wants to get closer to you, or if he just sees you as a buddy. If he puts his arm around you, you need to know it's because he likes you, not because he's just palling around. Here are some ways to see if his body language means he likes you as more than a friend:
- Notice how he sits next to you. Does he always try to move closer until your knees touch, or is he sitting miles away?
- Try to see if you can catch him stealing a glance in your direction. If you catch his eye and he even blushes and looks away, then he knows he's been caught!
- See if he's always looking for excuses to touch you. Does he get physical if you're playing a friendly game of volleyball or soccer, and does he always ask you to be his partner when it's time for chicken fights in the pool?
- See if his body is directed towards you when you speak. Does he stand with his body towards you and his arms gesturing or at his sides? If so, then he wants to give you all of his attention.
- See how he touches other girls. Does he put his arm around every girl, or only you?
- See if he ever gently pats your hand, even when he’s joking. This is a very intimate gesture, and it may show that he really likes you.
Pay attention to the things he does for you.He may just be a really good friend, or all of those favors he's doing for you may mean something more. Notice all of the things he does for you and think about what they mean. Here's how to tell:
- See if he's being very thoughtful. Does he bring you coffee when you're having an intense study session, or get tickets for a movie you hinted that you want to see? If so, then he's probably hanging on to your every word and just wants to make you happy.
- See if he does nice things for everyone. Is he just "Mr. Nice Guy" and loves giving rides and buying lunch for everyone in town, or does he do these things for only you? Remember, if he likes you, then he'll treat youdifferentlythan everybody else.
- If he helps you out with your chores, like doing your laundry, then he definitely wants to be your boyfriend.
- If he offers to help you with your car, he's not just being friendly - he wants you to be impressed by his manliness.
Study him in action with other girls.You need to check out how he talks to other girls to see if he treats them just like he treats you, or if he thinks you're special to him. You don't have to stare or stalk to get a sense of how he treats others and to have a sense of where you stand with him.
- See if he's a perpetual flirt. Does he flirt with every girl in the room, or only you? Remember, he may still like you if he flirts with other girls, but it makes it less likely that he's singling you out.
- You can also look for the opposite sign. Does he flirt with every girl except for you? Then maybe he’s not flirting with you because you’re the only one he really likes. He may respect you too much to tease or flirt with you like he does with every other girl.
- Does he seem embarrassed or shy if he hangs out with a new girlfriend in front of you? If so, then he may not want you to see his relationship unfolding because he’d rather be with you.
- See if the other girls he hangs out with know who you are. If he’s with another girl and she gives you an, “Oh, I’ve heard aboutyou” look, then the girl may be jealous because you’re important to the guy.
See if he’s always trying to hang out with you.If he likes you, then he’ll want to be around you as much as possible. He could try to do this in subtle and not-so-subtle ways. Here are a few signs that he wants to be around you because he sees you as more than a friend:
- If he acts like you’re the only person in the room when you’re hanging out in big groups. If you’re at a party, concert, or a bar, and you realize you ended up talking to him for most of the night, then he definitely wants to get closer to you.
- If you have a class together and he always tries to sit next to you and even saves you a seat, then he may want to take things to the next level.
- Notice if he sometimes just happens to run into you in your favorite coffee shop or bar. If he’salwaysaround, then he may have a stalking problem, but if he’s just “in the area” occasionally, then it may be because he’s hoping to run into you.
Analyze your hang-out sessions.Paying attention to how and how often you hang out and to when and where you hang out can give you great insight into whether he just wants to see you ask a friend or if he wants all of your hang-sessions to be more like dates. Here are some points to consider:
- Notice where you hang out. Do you see him in romantic locations like gardens, nicer wine bars, or places where you see couples hanging out for date nights? If so, then he may want the same for you.
- Notice who is around when you hang out. If it’s always just the two of you, then he may see you as crush material. But if he’s always inviting ten of his closest bros along, then he may see you just as another friend.
- Notice when you hang out. If you only see him once a month, then he may not be trying to spend more time with you. But if it feels like you haven’t gone more than a day without seeing him recently, then yeah, he probably likes you.
- Notice what you do when you hang out. Going out for coffee or a quick lunch is more meant for the friend zone, but going out for dinner or seeing a movie in the evening is a more-than-friend activity.
See if he flirts with you.This may feel like a no brainer, but it may be harder to tell if he’s flirting with you than you think. Every guy has his own flirting style, and there will be a variety of ways to flirt with you to show that he definitely likes you. Here are a few signs that he’s flirting:
- If he’s always trying to make you laugh if you have a class together, and even doodles in the margins of your notes, then he’s definitely flirting with you.
- If he sends you a lot of emoticons when he’s texting, then he’s flirting with you.
- If he’s always playfully hitting you or giving you a gentle shove, then he’s flirting with you.
- If he loves dunking you underwater when you’re in a pool, then he is definitely flirting.
- If he’s always trying to make you laugh or giggle, then he’s definitely flirting. If he blushes when you’re both laughing, then he’s definitely feeling flirtatious.
Ask for a Second Opinion
Ask your friends what they think.If you have some close friends who are always hanging around you two, then you may be able to ask them if they think he really likes you. You may be too blinded by Cupid’s arrow to be able to see the situation clearly, but one of your friends may have more insight.
- Ask a friend you trust who already knows the situation well. If she’s seen you hang out a bunch of times, she should have an opinion.
- Ask a friend to study the two of you next time you’re together and to report back. Just make sure the friend isn’t being too obvious.
- Pick a friend whose opinion and judgment you value. Pick someone with good social sense to get the best answer.
- Tell your friends to be honest. If they really don’t think he likes you, or even know that he likes someone else, then you should benefit from the truth.
If you’re feeling bold, ask his friends.This is a very dangerous step. There are few boys who would break “bro code” and not run and report your question back to your crush. But if you don’t know who else to ask or if you really trust one of his friends, then casually ask how he feels about you.
- Though this is a riskier step, his friends will have a better answer than your friends, since they have first-hand information from your guy.
- Ask his friend if he likes you could also just be a sneaky way to let him know how you feel. If you’re too scared to tell him yourself, this information will get back to him ASAP if you tell the wrong person.
Ask him yourself.Once you’re feeling fairly confident that the guy likes you and are tired of waiting around and reading the signs, it may be time to just tell him how you feel and ask if he feels the same way. He could be really shy and may be relieved that you’re taking the initiative. Here’s how to ask him if he really likes you:
- Whatever happens, ultimately even if the guy doesn't feel the same way, know that you're beautiful and good enough.
- Remember that guys aren't everything and if he doesn't like you, he's probably not worth your time anyway. Especially if he's rude about it.
- If he looks for similarities between you and him he definitely likes you.
- Don't constantly try to be around him. Let the guy breathe!
- Do not act completely psycho when he is around.
- Talk about another guy and observe his reaction. If he becomes a bit moody and annoyed he likes you!
- Do not laugh at all of his jokes (unless they are actually funny)
- Don't try to force love into his heart. This doesn't always work. Jealousy works sometimes though.
- Let guys come to you and then go to them make them feel like a chaser.
- Try to friendzone him subtly and see his reaction. If he’s a bit annoyed/sad he most likely likes you. If he says something like “You're a great friend, too” he's probably not into you romantically.
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